The Budget
May 17, 2026
JPMorgan formally reclassified AI from 'experimental R&D' to 'core infrastructure' — $19.8 billion annual budget; Raven: 'AI is plumbing now'; Duck updated his LinkedIn to 'Senior AI Plumber, Full-Stack' and profile views tripled; Chicken's still figuring out how to USE it; Dove wants to reclassify the team budget because it just sounds more essential; Raven: 'She's going to rename the wifi'; Parrot reclassified hers in 2024 — twelve agents run prod, she calls them load-bearing; Sparrow: 'She files them under electricity.'